We have both been single for awhile and obviously whatever it was that we were doing was NOT working…so it’s time to change up the routine. We have decided to get more proactive about this dating thing. Here are some ways that eHarmony seems better than most dating sites:
1) It takes a ridiculously long time to fill out the questionnaire, so expect to spend at least two hours doing this. If you are not sure what you are looking for you will by the end of this process.
2) You cannot surf through endless singles and window shop. You do not see anyone unless they are a matched to you. The matches are sent based on your answers in the questionnaire.
3) “Guided communication” - this means there are steps to follow if you want to communicate with your match. First you send a set of questions to someone you’re interested in, and then your match can respond and has to send you a set of questions. After that you send your “Must Haves” and “Can’t Stands”, and then it’s on to round two of the questions. After getting past the second round of questions you then proceed to “Open Communication”, this means you can send eHarmony e-mails to each other.
4) Open communication can be a bit daunting because you can chat with someone for a while and feel like “am I ever going meet this person?” Then again it is also good in the sense you can get a better feel for someone before meeting up, so it’s like a double edge sword you just have to get past.
I have made it through all these stages with a match. We finally met for a drink after a month of communicating. From my prospective it went well, we got along; we have a lot of common interests and the same sense of humor. Now this is where the confusion comes in, as to what happens next. He did ask if we can do this again some time, so how long do you wait for the next date? If he has not asked you within 48 hours of your initial meeting should you just move on? Also the hard part with dating is trying to not take it personally when you don’t get asked for a second date. Here’s the deal people - I think we should start being upfront at the end of the date if you want to see me again say so and then follow through. If not just say it was great meeting you and have a nice life.
On a good note I did have a good time and if anything eHarmony got me to go on a date with someone nice who I got along with. I don’t have any other prospective matches in the works at the moment but I still have 2 months left on there and I am hopeful.
So if you’ve tried everything and still haven’t gone online give it a try…really you have nothing to loose.
Good Luck, it’s a jungle out there!
Cheers!
Single Gal
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