Between a Rock and a Hard Place

I have a friend who is an inexperienced dater, I’m not going to go into the details as to why she hasn’t gone out with anyone seriously, but I can tell you she is physically fine and mentally adequate although her lack of experience makes things difficult. Why, you may ask? Well it has to do with the fact that you’re dealing with a women in her late 30s who has the dating mind set of a teenager and at times even a pre-teen.

My friend is mature in her everyday life but when it comes to men I’m at a loss as to how to deal with her. It’s like being a teenager again and wanting to tell your friend something controversial and wondering how they will handle it. A normal woman would appreciate feedback from her girlfriend or better yet not need it because they see the signs. This isn’t the case with my friend as she lives in a bubble and doesn’t ask for feedback so I’m always at a loss as to whether to be honest or just let her live in her little dream world.

My dilemma stems from our Saturday night out, everything was good, we were dancing having a fun night and we met some nice men (they were in their 30s, yeah) who treated us to drinks. At the end of the night we ended up grabbing a bite with them which in my opinion was no biggie. The guys were nice but not physically attractive to me, and I didn’t think any of the other single ladies thought so either. The problem was that there was flirty behaviour between pairs of us and to me it was completely innocent and nothing more than just being flirty girls with flirty boys. When we departed numbers were exchanged but it again was innocent and not romantic.

Well I think my friend thinks more of this night out and I also believe she wants more from the night out because she is desperate to not be alone. The problem is the guy that she was talking to was more enraptured by her sister (K) than to her. K has a boyfriend so the guy had no chance with her and I won’t go into details as to why I thought this but let’s say he beelined for K and was talking to her for most of the night until the end when he moved to my friend.

What to do? I don’t know....but when dealing with a teenager tread carefully. That’s the only advice I have for myself and for you.

Queen B